How to calm your lover down after an intense playdate (Erotic Playdates #9)

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Susan Bratton Dr. Patti Taylor Sloane Fox Tallulah Sulis

Erotic Playdates are when you and your partner set aside a specific time for passion play. You plan for (and look forward to) sensual "private" activities where you come together beginners to learn new things together. Think of Erotic Playdates as fun "couples sexercises" that grow and enrich your intimacy - physical and emotional. This is hot monogamy at its best and it's also great for singles who date! Knowing how to bring your Erotic Playdate to a graceful conclusion is wonderful and very reassuring to your partner. Think about it... You have just taken your lover on a very intimate journey. As you both calm down, you'll both be open and vulnerable. You'll be in the extraordinary realm of Loverspace. Your neurology and hormones are in a way different place than before the date. Your partner can still be quite aroused, excited, and eager. Even if they appear to be tired. This practice is about how to take yourselves from a highly expanded Erotic Playdate back to a calm and neutral loving state where you can both have a conversation and walk around the bedroom. One way to do this is to slow down your stroking and touching patterns while gracefully increasing the pressure you apply with your touch on their body and erogenous zones. As you start to do this, let your partner know you are moving to a process of bringing them back to a calm, neutral state. Say something like, "I'm going to start bringing you down now." Take your time to wait until both of you can settle down and get more and more relaxed. No longer hot and eager for action - and feeling more like a chat, go for a pleasant walk, or make a meal together. Remember, continue to ask your partner if they would want MORE or LESS pressure with each stroke and touch you do. Slowly transition from longer, broader strokes to slow, small, light, and nearly unnoticeable strokes. At this point, less (or even no) motion is better. You're calming each other down. So slow down, as if time itself was slowing down for both of you. From here you can continue the Playdate with kissing, hugging, or even some kind and loving words. You can even choose to share favorite frames, cuddle, and even do the Responsible Grounding exercise we talked about in previous weeks. Remember, Erotic Playdates are simple ways you can expand your intimate life. Just like how our weekly articles do the same. Find time to get comfy and read your favorite ones.

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Expand Your Life, Dr. Patti Taylor Dr. Patti is an author, coach, and seminar leader. She has a PhD in Expanded Orgasms, and is the creator of the bestselling program Expand Her Orgasm Tonight and The Seduction Trilogy: Seduce Her Tonight, Seduction Accelerator and Sexual Trainer. She's been a practitioner and teacher of Expanded Orgasms for over 30 years.

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