If you love the topic of attraction, and you'd like to get my most in-depth thinking about it, then go and read THIS:
Our topic this week is ATTRACTION.
Before you read further, I'd like you to take a minute and think about what the word ATTRACTION means to you.
By the way, I'm talking about the romantic concept of ATTRACTION...not gravitational attraction, etc.
If you can, WRITE DOWN exactly what you think the word ATTRACTION means. The process of writing down your thoughts helps you to organize them (I recommend that you also keep a journal of your experiences as you improve in this area of your life). There are no right or wrong answers here, so think about it for a few minutes...
ACTUALLY WRITE YOUR THOUGHTS DOWN.
OK, did you do that? Nice.
So what did you come up with?
A lot of guys seem to think that ATTRACTION is when one person wants what another person has.
Some think of ATTRACTION as the result of being good-looking or otherwise "attractive." In fact, I think a LOT of people confuse ATTRACTION with "attractive."
When I think of the concept of ATTRACTION, I think of it primarily as an EMOTION. It seems to me that it's more a COMBINATION of powerful emotions that come together to form a very, very special new SUPER-emotion.
However you think about it, there is a process that happens that keeps men and women getting together to have sex...
You are reading this right now, which is a miracle.
Think of the thousands upon thousands of generations of ancestors that you have had...and think about the fact that NOT ONE OF THEM DIED A VIRGIN.
And not one of them died in childhood. And then think about the fact that you beat out about five hundred MILLION other sperm-racers to get to the egg first.
You are the result of, and represent, probably the most amazing process I have ever heard of.
One of the parts of this process that fascinates me is how each pair of your ancestors decided to get together with THAT PARTICULAR PERSON at THAT PARTICULAR TIME.
I know that some people will be upset that I'm talking about this whole concept in such an analytical, detached way...women in particular seem to love the fantasy of two people being "soul mates" and "knowing that your special someone is out there" and "it just happening."
If you're one of those people, stop reading now! lol...
After working on this area of my own personal life for a few years, and trying all kinds of techniques, it finally dawned on me that ATTRACTION WAS BASICALLY EVERYTHING.
If a woman feels ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else really matters.
Looks, age, nationality, wealth, religion, personal loss, peer pressure from friends and family...none of it matters!
On the other hand, if a women DOESN'T feel ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else matters in that case either!
You can't "talk" a woman into feeling ATTRACTION, any more than you can "talk" a person who hasn't eaten for three days out of feeling hungry.
I mean, if you really wanted to be fancy, you could learn to be a hypnotist and talk them into it that way...
But I'll tell you a little secret: Even THAT isn't the best way to do things! (I actually know several people who use this method of hypnotizing women...and I haven't met one yet who could use this technique alone to get women...there's ALWAYS something else going on.)
What I'm trying to say is that one day it hit me like a ton of bricks that ATTRACTION IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING WITH WOMEN!
If you don't know what it is or how to create it, you'll wander around trying different techniques...and probably never land on something that works consistently.
And once I realized this, all kinds of things that didn't make sense before INSTANTLY made sense to me.
All of a sudden I realized why women dated abusive jerks...ATTRACTION.
I realized why women dated men who were clearly using them and cheating on them... ATTRACTION.
And I also saw the FLIP SIDE!
I realized why women pass up guys who are honest, stable, attractive, and wonderful for losers...ATTRACTION.
Think of ATTRACTION like a drug (which it really is). If a woman is under the influence of it, then she's gone. She'll do anything to get more. One of the things that most fascinates me is the "language" that triggers attraction inside of women. I call it "Sexual Communication" and you can learn all about it here:
If she's NOT under the influence, then YOU'RE gone. Nothing you do will matter if she doesn't feel it.
If you doubt what I'm saying, ask the next 10 SUPER HOT women you see what they think of this. Read this newsletter to them, and watch their reactions. You'll see.
OK, now that you've heard a little bit more of my personal perspective, I'd like you to look back into your life and think about all those situations with women that made no sense at all...
Think about the women that you treated wonderfully that passed you up for the jerks... and think about all the women "friends" you had...the ones who told you about how mean and inconsiderate their boyfriends were... while you looked at them thinking "I would kill my own mother for just one date with you."
Is it all making sense now?
THEY DIDN'T FEEL ATTRACTION FOR YOU! YOU WERE BEING A "NICE GUY" AND PROBABLY A WUSSY BOY, AND YOU HAD NO IDEA THAT IT WAS HAVING THE EXACT OPPOSITE EFFECT OF WHAT YOU WANTED! AND WORSE YET, THERE WASN'T A DAMN THING YOU COULD DO ABOUT IT! It's harsh to think about, but it's true. (By the way, if you don't do something to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION, then most likely, this is going to keep happening to you for the rest of your life.)
I have to point out one more thing. As I mentioned earlier, I think a lot of guys confuse the idea of being "attractive" with the emotion called ATTRACTION.
You can make a woman feel an INCREDIBLE ATTRACTION, even though you're not what most people would think of as "attractive." Of course, you have to know how...
The point is that if you're not tall, handsome, and dashing, you can LEARN how to make women feel this wonderful emotion called ATTRACTION.
It's a skill. It's taken me YEARS to be able to even talk about this stuff in simple terms like this that makes sense, and it's taken me the same time to figure out how a regular guy like you or I can make women who we used to think of as "out of our league," feel ATTRACTION for us.
How, you ask, can we do that? Well, you've read about the technique called "Cocky and Funny"...that's a part of it.
But there are several other pieces of the puzzle, from voice tone and body language, to specific ways to touch a woman to get her physically turned on, and everything in between. It's a system, and it all works together.
There are two KEY aspects of learning how to be successful with women and dating:
1) The Inner Game
2) The Outer Game
The INNER GAME is all about learning how to THINK and how to manage your thoughts and emotions. It's also about understanding how and why attractive women feel that amazing emotion called ATTRACTION for some men, and not for MOST men.
The OUTER GAME is all of the techniques, what to say and such.
Which is more important? Well, they're BOTH important. But what I notice is that most guys want to learn the OUTER GAME first.
In other words, they want pick-up lines, fancy tricks, and other things.
I can remember when I first started learning this stuff.
I had this idea in my mind that if I could learn how to get women to give me their numbers that I'd be the MAN.
Well, I learned that I can get just about any woman's phone number in a few minutes.
But guess what? Once I learned how to get women's phone numbers, I ran into a much BIGGER issue...the women usually flaked out on me, didn't show up, etc.
And the ones that DID show up were difficult. Nothing happened. I realized that there had to be more. And, as it turns out, there is...A LOT more, in fact.
The REASON that the "Inner Game" is so important, is that attractive women don't judge you on your "pick-up lines."
And just because a woman gives you her phone number or email address DOES NOT mean that she FEELS anything inside (like ATTRACTION).
Women don't DECIDE to feel ATTRACTION for a man.
ATTRACTION is something that happens on its own, for its own reasons.
Attraction Isn't A Choice! The way to cause women to feel ATTRACTION for you is to UNDERSTAND how and why it works, and then communicate in a way that makes it happen.
In my Advanced Dating Techniques program, I spend several HOURS teaching "The Inner Game"
...all those things that help you get the INSIDE together, so you can then get the OUTSIDE together.
This stuff is CRITICAL to your success. I wouldn't have taken all the time, effort, and energy to put this together unless I thought it was important.
If you want to overcome your challenges and really take your success to the next level, then you owe it to yourself to check it out.
And if you haven't had a chance to download my eBook "Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women," then you need to do that now. You can download it and be reading it within a few minutes...
If you've tried all kinds of techniques, and nothing seems to "work," then you need to work on your Inner Game. When you get the inner game together, everything will start to work a LOT better...
I'll talk to you again soon.
P.S. If you'd like to see all of the different programs I've created to help you learn how to meet women, take a minute and check this out: