Proven "Techniques" For Sparking Attraction
NOTE: If you want an in-depth, behind-the-scenes, fast-track
education in female psychology and sexual attraction...
combined with step-by-step techniques for overcoming
fear, approach women, setting up dates, and taking
things to a physical level with women... then check this
out:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/AdvancedSeries/
***QUESTION***
Hello David,
I want to say, your books are great, I just got
them and I feel a lot more confident. I have a few
questions. I go to a site... and read some of
their articles every so often, they talk about
wingmen and how to use your buddies to your
advantage when trying engaging in conversation
with women. What is your opinion about this and
how do you use this if you do?
And the second question is also from the site; I
have been talking to a woman for a few minutes and
the conversation goes ok. I ask her name and she
tells me. She never asks my name ever in the
conversation ,is that a sign she is not
interested? Any help in clearing my confused head
would be helpful.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
To answer your first question, there are
positives and negatives about using a buddy for a
"wingman".
My opinions:
1) If you go out with a wingman, make sure he's A
LOT better than you at meeting women. Pay
attention, let him lead, and learn from the
situations you get into.
2) If you don't have any friends that are good
with women, FIND SOME. I don't care what you have
to do, just go do it... make some friends that are
good with women, and watch closely as they
communicate with women. You'll learn about 100
TIMES as much if you first read my book and listen
to my CD Audio Series, because you'll know what to
look for.
3) It's also a good idea to use a wingman if you
need the "moral support" of a friend to get
yourself started meeting women. But make sure that
your friend can handle himself when talking to
women. If he can't, he's probably going to make
things worse and scare women away from you. Trust
me, I've been through this one MANY times.
What I'm trying to say is that using a
"wingman" is great if it works for you. Try it.
To answer your question of "if a woman never
asks my name, is it a sign that she's not
interested?"...
I'm going to answer this in two ways.
First, I'll say that if a woman doesn't ask
your name, it MIGHT mean that she's not
interested.
But the thing that concerns me about your
question is that you're really looking in the
wrong direction for clues to decide if a woman
"likes you".
IT DOESN'T MATTER IF A WOMAN "LIKES" YOU!
The only thing that matters is whether or not
she feels that powerful, magical, all-important
emotion called ATTRACTION!
I've had women who were annoyed by me, bothered
by me, and basically upset at me still feeling
ATTRACTION for me because I did the right things.
I've had women who started out fighting with me
feeling so attracted to me that they wouldn't
leave me alone for the evening until I gave them
my number.
My point is that you need to get over caring
what a woman thinks about you... and start doing
the right things.
If this doesn't make sense to you, then stay
tuned and check out my Advanced Dating Techniques
Program... really.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
Just want to tell you your material is very
good and effective. I find that women love a guy
that teases them and busts their balls. I find
that they like it when a man approaches them and
he is completely calm and cool, and even better in
control of the situation. Now I admit this,
sometimes the way I approach a girl or what I seem
to talk about doesn't "hit em" how I wanted it
too, like I seem to get boring, pretty damn
quikly...and that is when my mind just starts to
draw a blank and I dont know..it sucks. But
sometimes I say the right things and I just know
this for a fact becuz the girl will either have a
smile on her face or I'll see her licking her
lips...and from what u said in the DYD book thats
a good thing...For example: today I was sitting at
a round table with just me and a girl, we were
facing each other, and I'd say she was about an 8.
She dresses real pretty and I said something like
"Do you dress nice everyday...Or are you just
trying to impress me?" She smiled and licked her
lips so I knew that I was right on track...but
then I drew a blank... I didnt kno how to continue
that convo. What are some normal topics to bring
up in a conversation with a girl? What are some
interesting ones that they just seem to be very
into? What else would help me to keep the convo
going and so I don't draw a blank and feel like a
dork? I appreciate all the help your book has
done, reading about confidence and all that did
help..and now I would just like to touch up and
become more than just an amatuer. You do not have
to post this on the newsletter but hope to hear
from you soon.
Later,
D from CT
>>>MY COMMENTS:
This is a great question.
One of the most important things you can do is
MENTALLY PREPARE for these kinds of situations.
Now, I don't want to sound like a weird
motivational self-help guy, but mental preparation
WORKS.
Take some time when you're alone, close your
eyes, and actually plan out how you'd like
interactions with women to go. If you've never
done this before, you'll learn A LOT from it.
You'll think of things that you never would
have imagined when you're taking things step by
step in your mind.
One of the OTHER best things you can do is GET
A JOURNAL so you can keep notes to yourself.
Try this:
Sit down and write out 20 great things you
could have said in that situation, then go through
and mentally imagine saying each one five times.
Another important thing to do is ALWAYS KNOW
HOW TO GET HER INFORMATION AND WALK AWAY.
If you really sense that the conversation is
about to end, you need to know how to ask for her
email/number and go.
You can do this at any stage in the
conversation, as soon as you'd like.
Here are a few good topics to try when talking
to women:
1. Why women are crazy, and men are perfect.
2. That she should stop thinking of you only as a
sex object.
3. What she needs to change to have a chance with
you.
Of course, you need to be able to present these
topics in a COCKY & FUNNY way so she LAUGHS while
you're talking about them...
You'll find that topics like these can create
some good fun with women.
***QUESTION***
Hi David,
You are absolutely right! Being nice and wussy
doesn't work AT ALL!! Now, this technique of
getting e-mail in three minutes... I must admit
that it works very often. But it fails rather
often too. Guess my success rate is only about 50%
or something. That is, 40% gives a dummy address
and 10% does NEVER respond. Maybe i'm doing
something wrong here. But somehow i get the
impression that most women are smarter than that.
The most common response to that situation is
something like: "What? You talk to me for a few
minutes and you expect me to give my e-mail?"
My question could either be: "What am i doing
wrong?" or "Is 50% the outcome that you would
expect from this technique?". I let you decide
which question you want to answer in the interest
of your readers. Anyway, you don't hear me
complain. Because i've learned an awful lot from
your book. And my success rates have at least
doubled, if not tripled, after reading your stuff.
And 50% is far better than where i come from.
Now, for my success story, this is an approach
that gives me about 80% success. I talk to a woman
for ten minutes (not three ;-)) and then i say
something like "Hey, you seem to be rather
smart... or is that just an impression?". When she
says "no" i respond with: "Yeah right, that's what
they all say! I bet you don't dare me to double
check that!". Then i don't give her much time to
respond. I immediately come back with: "Oh... you
do? Okay... if you're up to the test, give me your
e-mail. I'll send you some tricky questions and i
expect SMART answers." I never mention "meeting"
because that always seems to trigger some
"pushing" alert. Obviously, when she refuses to
give her e-mail, i say: "See! That's exactly what
i mean! Boy! Am i disappointed!". I very often get
her e-mail after that. And those seem to be ALWAYS
correct addresses ;-) Keep up the terrific job
David! You are really HELPING! Bye, PhD (Belgium)
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I love letters like this one.
You get good email addresses from HALF the
women you talk to for three minutes?
I'd say that you're doing pretty well, cowboy.
Probably half of the women in this world are
either married, in a relationship, lesbians
(YES!), or in a bad mood.
Your technique for getting it up to 80% is
great.
Challenging, funny, and interesting. It creates
curiosity and comes across as low risk for the
women. Very nice.
Just keep working on it, and you'll improve
over time.
Good job!
***QUESTION***
Dear David,
I have to say, I am bloody disappointed with your
advice at the moment...
I've used your tips, and written you on 2
occasions concerning different subjects. Your last
mailbag actually spoke about an issue I'd had with
a woman who I KNOW is interested in me, who gave
me her number, told me she was busy and never
called back.
I love music, so, I'm always in the CD shop at the
local mall. There just happens to be a number of
attractive women who work there. To make a long
story short, one the girls starts being really
nice to me after I start ripping on her, always
waving saying hi, going out of her way to serve me
on occasions. Hell, once I heard a co worker run
out the back and say "he's here" and she came
running out to ask if I need looking after...
Never really acted interested though, didn't speak
about much other than "how was your weekend"
stuff.
So I start running into her at a club. Again she
goes out of her way to say hi. So finally she
waved from across the room one day and I signal
her to come over as I was getting a drink, she
runs over and gives me a hug and a kiss hello!! (I
don't really know this girl from a bar of soap). I
was really tired, had only slept 4 hrs the night
before, was pretty drunk, it was late too and I
was about to leave.
Basically I could have taken her home right then
and there (trust me!!) but instead I just said for
her to give me her number that I'd take her out
sometime. Didn't offer her a drink, just said I
had to go back to my friends, then we left.
I had been supposed to visit her the next day, it
was usually the day I went shopping, but I was
busy. I call her the day after, she acted fully
uninterested said she was going away for 10 days
and that she'd call after she'd packed that day.
Such as yet, no call... I don't care, she'll pay
when I see her again... in a few weeks (sometimes
it's a weeks in between visits). I'd say we r
playing a game now.
Also, just recently had a girl who I'd known thru
a friend start msging me, asking to come over to
spend time with me, she said 'chat', but she
didn't want to chat. I'd busted on her a bit
before that started happening.
The issue here with your advice is this...
How the hell do I get these girls to stop throwing
"IT" at me?? It's no fun when I just get it served
up. It's not like I get a chance to tell em that
I'm not easy, they don't say in that many words
that they want to sleep with me. You just know.
I like to play with them a bit and see if they r
gonna be worth the trouble... and I want to know a
bit about a girl before I sleep with them.
Damn dave, what's going on?? I'm just too good for
my own good it seems, how can I slow things down
and get em to play a bit longer??
Cheers!!!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You're asking the wrong guy the wrong
question... Ha Ha! I've helped you get to the
point where women are "throwing themselves at
you", and you want to know how to SLOW THEM DOWN?
Maybe go check out some "mars and venus" books
or something.
Or watch some Dr. Phil or Oprah.
I don't know... this just isn't my area of
specialty.
You're killing me over here.
***QUESTION***
Thanks a lot David, NOT!!! I've been reading your
mails for a while now and I've unconsciously been
integrating the "Cocky&Funny" into my personality
(which is great by the way), and it's so much fun
that I've realized that I do it all the time (I've
also realized that being cocky and funny with a
girl is just as if you were messing around with
your male friends' heads). But yeah so I've got a
complaint or success story, I'm not sure which it
is: so there's this girl who I've met about a year
ago and we've been best friends since then... and
then the other day she admitted to my face that
she had been in love with me for the past six
months!!!!!!!! It makes me feel great about
myself...but on the other hand it sucks cuz she
was a really great friend, almost a sister, so
I'll never be able to go out with her (and there's
nothing wrong with the looks or anything). So
yeah, I think you should put a surgeon general's
warning on your "Cocky&Funny". WARNING: May cause
you to be unexplainably attractive to (almost)
anyone! So yeah, a word of advice to all those
reading the newsletters, be careful who you use
the C&F with!
Nick, the Belgian
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Wow, another horrible side effect.
I really should stop teaching this stuff and be
a monk or something.
By the way, you can learn some more Cocky &
Funny techniques here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/CockyComedy/
***SUCCESS STORY FROM A WOMAN***
You answered my email in a recent mailbag, thank
you for answering me so quickly. Your mini- van
comment, while making me want to vomit, made me
realize I had to do something - and fast! On our
next date I said something obnoxious to him and he
gave me a funny look. Before he could say anything
I said, "you know sometimes I can get kinda
obnoxious, and when I do... just tell me to
shutup, - and from that point on he didn't let me
get away with anything! He is a "real man" after
all!! Yeah! And you said trying to teach a guy
how to stop acting like a WUSSY isn't easy ;)
Later that night when we were saying good-bye, he
said he was going to come by my work to visit, I
asked him what time he'd be there, and he just
said "you'll see" with a smirk. I smiled, said
"good answer," kissed him, and left.
Ah, the miracle of attraction! Can't wait to see
him again...thank you for saving this
relationship, and for saving me from dying of
boredom!
Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you
Thank you
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Am I really reading this stuff?
I've now got women who are teaching men this
material because they just can't deal with the
WUSS FACTOR any longer...
It's really too much.
The lesson:
A WOMAN WOULD RATHER TEACH YOU HOW TO ACT LIKE
A REAL MAN THAN DEAL WITH A WUSSY.
Unreal.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I just got your book after receiving the
newsletters for a few months and my eyes were
really opened to how many new skills I need to
acquire. In the past 6 months (before reading your
book) I went from being too nice to becoming a
prick. After reading your book, I now see that
there is much, much more to it and that it's ok to
be nice sometimes, but only on your terms. I am
having a ton of more fun now and am def. getting
reactions from women, but I realize I need to find
a middle ground. Being cocky came a little too
easy for me and right now I am focusing on adding
humor to my personality to balance it. I got
Helitzer's book but it seems a bit overwhelming.
What helped you the most when it came to adding
humor to your personality and where is a good
place to start? One thing I would recommend to all
readers is to find a good female friend to discuss
your material with. They will prove to you that
this stuff is really attention getting and will
help you improve overall.
Thanks in advance.
AW in Pa
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You've brought up a great point here.
It's SOOOO important that you find the balance
between Cocky and Funny...
If you're too cocky and arrogant you'll come
across as insecure, and if you're too funny
without adding any of the magic of being Cocky,
then you'll come across as stupid and goofy.
You must strike the balance.
You'll know when you're getting it right,
because the responses from women will become very
powerful.
Even if the reading is difficult, I still
recommend that you read the comedy book you
purchased. It's great.
As I recommended to another reader above, take
the time to write out ideas for different
situations, then rehearse them in your mind.
You'll know when you find the right balance.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I am from a Latin American country so forgive my
english if i make some mistakes. I met a girl in a
trip to the beach and i really liked her very
much. I met some of her friends and asked what was
her phone number. Several weeks after that i call
her and talk some time and i had to hang up. some
time after that i called her again and we talked
for hours and she seemeed very interested in me so
we stop talking. One time i called her to her
celular and she didnt answer and inmediatly she
called to my house that showed me that she was
interested in me. But then i called her almost
daily and she sort of got bored and when the
conversation got to about a minute she told me she
had to go. I insisted on calling her more but that
only brought bad results and i ask her if i didnt
like her i think i realy blew it with her because
i acted like a wuss.
It has passed about 3 months without talking to
her i have run with her a few times but ignore her
i dont know why. i was really pissed off but some
friends of her that are also my friends told me
that she sort of liked me. i knew she liked me
before i acted like a wuss but i think enough time
have passed and i would like to talk to her again
because during those 3 months i thought about
calling her everyday and i would want some advice
so i can know what to do. Please answer quickly i
am waiting eagerly for your answer. Please excuse
some of my expressions english is not my first
language.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, you hit the nail on the head.
When you start calling a woman too often,
acting clingy and needy, and generally behaving
like a total WUSS BAG, you're probably going to
drive her away.
Don't do it anymore!
You need to move on, and get over it.
It's a hard thing for most guys to accept, but
when you've convinced a woman beyond the shadow of
any reasonable doubt that you are a world-class
WUSSY, you just need to move on.
It's an uphill battle to try to convince her
otherwise, so just get on with your life, and
don't make the same mistake again.
Repeat after me:
"I will stop acting like a WUSS"
***QUESTION FROM A WOMAN***
I don't think I'll start my e-mail with a success
story since I'm a woman and have the freedom to
walk into any bar, walk up to any man and tell
him, "by the end of tonight you'll be in bed with
me" and it will happen.
I've been using your techniques on men for years
but never could put into words how or why it
worked. I think most of your principles are true
for both sexes. My friends often accuse me of
being a man on the inside and this is why. I am a
very confident, self sufficient 22 yr old woman,
about an 8 on a 1-10 scale. Add on top of this
the fact that I use your C+F techniques.
Most times I just meet men that I can walk all
over and lose interest in the first 30 seconds
(this is why I'm compared to men). Every now and
then I meet a man who also knows how the
attraction thing works and we hit it off and have
a great "mental tennis" match. This is the
problem. The men I do meet that can match me and
keep my interest are great for a little while, but
then once they realize I can keep up with them and
please them in bed like most women won't, they get
over excited and turn into wussies. They start
telling me how they've looked their whole life for
a woman like me and yadda yadda. That's great and
I appreciate the compliments, but they aren't
keeping up the C+F/self confidence and I lose
interest--FAST. Case in point: I met a guy who
was about a 6 on a 1-10 scale. He had the whole
C+F thing going on. Everything was great for a few
dates until he confessed to me that he felt like
he was "playing out of his sandbox" and that he
didn't understand why someone as beautiful as I
would continue to see him. In the snap of a
finger I lost all interest in him because at that
point, I was above him instead of on equal playing
ground.
So this is my question: Is there a secret
underground society of double your dating fanatics
that actually know how to keep a woman's interest?
and if so where do I find these men? Also, since
I'm sure there isn't one, can you give me any
ideas as to how to keep men at a safe enough
distance that they don't feel like confiding all
their insecurities in me?
Thanks, David, you truly are an attraction genius!
Keep up the great work!
K.H. in Ogden, UT
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yes, there is a secret underground society of
Double Your Dating fanatics who actually know how
to keep a woman's interest.
But the bad news is that THEY'RE NOT IN OGDEN,
UTAH!
Was that your first guess about where they'd be
located?
Are you sure that you're as sharp as you say
you are?
I don't know if I personally buy it.
I've used your email to point out something
VERY IMPORTANT TO MY READERS...
MOST GUYS, EVEN WHEN THEY "GET IT", EVENTUALLY
TURN INTO TOTAL WUSS-BAGS AND STOP DOING THE
THINGS THAT ORIGINALLY MADE A WOMAN FEEL
ATTRACTION FOR THEM.
This is when the woman usually hits the road,
and the man is left thinking "What did I do
wrong... I was such a NICE GUY."
This is a bad thing, so don't do it.
***QUESTION***
Dave the Expert, i never in a million years
thought a book like yours would ever come out and
help millions of guys out here that constantly
struggle to find the exact way to attract a woman!
And your book is IT...!! i have had a lot of
success these past eight months ever since i
bought your book and from reading your
newsletters. i've never dated so many women, it's
grrrrrreat! but the time has come for me to ask
you a question that i am practically begging you
to respond to. i finally met this terrific girl
who i think is the "one" 4 months ago and we've
been dating since but we just recently broke up
because she moved to college about 4 hours away
from me. it hurt me so bad. i used the cocky/funny
approach to reel her in at the beginning and kept
up the cocky/funny attitude the whole way through
until...the break up. ouch! you see, we are both
dancers and we both dance in the same dance studio
but she only comes down from college to practice
maybe once every couple of weeks because her and i
are in a duet together. we have a competition in
about a month so i couldn't just back out of it
but it is really awkward having to dance with her
because i still have feelings for her and our duet
is avery emotional dance w/ a lot of feeling
involved. we broke up because she said that
college was stressing her out so much and she felt
that our relationship wouldn't work because long
distance relationships are hard and we couldn't
see each other as much as we wanted to. plus, she
is on scholarship and she can't let herself make
bad grades or else she can't maintain her
scholarship. she didn't mean this in a bad way but
told me that i was a little cause of her stress
because we would talk on the phone when she was
supposed to be doing homework. w/ all the homework
and the dance team practices up there she stays
busy and rarely ever gets to come down except to
practice our duet. we've agreed to just be friends
but dave, it just doesn't feel right. i want to be
more than friends but i just don't see a way for
this relationship to work out and have it be the
way it was when we first started dating! i miss
her so much and would do anythingto get her back
and i think i screwed up by telling her that! i
told her that i would make time for her and that i
never felt this way about a girl before, which is
true. god, i know i was a complete wussy after we
broke up but i felt that it was the right thing to
do because after 4 months it didn't seem to matter
if i spilled my feelings to her, right? dave, i
need to know what to do to get her back because i
still have to dance w/ her and i don't want to
feel uncomfortable and insecure when i'm around
her. any advice would greatly be appreciated!
-R.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I'm glad you've had so much success with the
materials, and I appreciate the feedback.
I don't usually respond to "relationship"
questions... but I just can't help this one.
You've switched into WUSS BOY mode, and you're
only shooting yourself in the foot, man.
Get on with your life, stop acting like a
wussy, and quit telling her that you'd "do
anything to get her back".
I know it's what you FEEL like saying, but it
will only make you look weaker and weaker if you
keep it up and don't just put it behind you and
move on.
If you want to have any chance at all of this
relationship work out, then you're going to have
to quit acting whipped and needy.
Now use what you've learned to go meet some new
women and stop acting like a Wuss.
***QUESTION***
Dear Dave,
I've been reading your articles for the past 2
weeks, i think it is so awesome, and i'm soon
going to buy your book. i wanted to tell you that
i have no problems with women when i'm not
attracted to them, but if they are a perfect 10 i
get scared, and i can't even say hi to them, help
me, how can i overcome this fear of pretty girls?
When the girl is not so hot i don't have any
problems talking to them, getting their phone
number and going on a date with them, the problem
is how do i attract the beautiful women and how
should i approach and actually start a
conversation with them?
thanks G. i appreciate your help.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, first of all, go check out an issue of
the magazine that goes by the name of Perfect 10.
You'll see that the women in there are all over
the map.
In other words, every guy has a different idea
of what a "10" is.
Yes, some women are obviously more attractive
or "fixed up" than others, but we all have
different tastes, and in the morning when she
wakes up she's going to look a WHOLE LOT different
than she does when you first see her.
So remember that this girl who is a "10" to you
is only a 6 or 7 to another guy. That should help.
Next, if you can't figure out how to get over
your fear of approaching attractive women, then
you're going to have to just face your fear and do
it anyway.
To start with, just focus on saying ANYTHING to
the women you see. You need to see for yourself
and teach your mind and body not to be afraid of
women.
I don't care if you walk up to the next 100
women you see and say "You're beautiful... can I
have your autograph?"
lol... that's pretty funny... I just might try
that one myself, come to think of it.
My point is that you need to JUST DO SOMETHING!
Most of the anxiety involved in approaching
attractive women comes from the FEAR OF THE
UNKNOWN and the FEAR OF EMBARRASSMENT OR
REJECTION.
Once you actually approach a bunch of women and
talk to them, you'll find that nothing bad is
going to happen to you. This works wonders.
Then, when you've gotten past your fear, you
can lead the conversations to getting numbers,
etc.
And SPEAKING of overcoming fear, starting
conversations with women, getting numbers, getting
dates, and learning how to take things to a
PHYSICAL level with women smoothly and without
rejection...
...I've spent a loooong time studying this
topic.
In fact, I've put more time, effort, and study
into this area than just about anyone I have ever
met (and I've met some guys who are pretty darn
good with women).
A few years ago I decided to do something kind
of crazy with all this amazing stuff I learned
about women and dating... I wrote it all down. In
fact, I not only wrote it all down, but I
organized it into logical sections, then created a
BOOK.
That book is called "Double Your Dating".
And then I did something ELSE that's kind of
crazy.
Instead of printing copies of the book, I
decided to only make it available on the
INTERNET... as a downloadable "eBook".
Gotta love technology.
And get this... if you'd like to get a copy of
this book, you can download it right now and
literally be reading it within a few minutes...
from your computer screen.
Go here to download it:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/eBook/
And if you've already read my eBook and you're
ready to REALLY get this entire area of your life
handled, then I'd like to suggest EXTREME
MEASURES...
My Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD program.
This program contains over 12 hours of
digitally recorded and edited video and/or audio
of me personally teaching ADVANCED techniques for
overcoming fear, approaching women, getting email
addresses and numbers... and I'm talking about
HUNDREDS of ideas.
When you go through this program, you'll also
meet some of my personal friends and guest
speakers who will teach you incredible secrets for
meeting women online, giving women fantastic date
experiences for little or no money... and
communicating in a way that makes women feel an
incredible "animal" attraction for you.
All live and all THE VERY BEST STUFF.
If you'd like to get a copy without risk to you,
go here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/AdvancedSeries/
And I'll talk to you soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. Make sure you take a minute to check out
the other programs I've created. You can see
them all right here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
--------------------------------------------------
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***QUESTION***
Hello David,
I want to say, your books are great, I just got
them and I feel a lot more confident. I have a few
questions. I go to a site... and read some of
their articles every so often, they talk about
wingmen and how to use your buddies to your
advantage when trying engaging in conversation
with women. What is your opinion about this and
how do you use this if you do?
And the second question is also from the site; I
have been talking to a woman for a few minutes and
the conversation goes ok. I ask her name and she
tells me. She never asks my name ever in the
conversation ,is that a sign she is not
interested? Any help in clearing my confused head
would be helpful.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
To answer your first question, there are
positives and negatives about using a buddy for a
"wingman".
My opinions:
1) If you go out with a wingman, make sure he's A
LOT better than you at meeting women. Pay
attention, let him lead, and learn from the
situations you get into.
2) If you don't have any friends that are good
with women, FIND SOME. I don't care what you have
to do, just go do it... make some friends that are
good with women, and watch closely as they
communicate with women. You'll learn about 100
TIMES as much if you first read my book and listen
to my CD Audio Series, because you'll know what to
look for.
3) It's also a good idea to use a wingman if you
need the "moral support" of a friend to get
yourself started meeting women. But make sure that
your friend can handle himself when talking to
women. If he can't, he's probably going to make
things worse and scare women away from you. Trust
me, I've been through this one MANY times.
What I'm trying to say is that using a
"wingman" is great if it works for you. Try it.
To answer your question of "if a woman never
asks my name, is it a sign that she's not
interested?"...
I'm going to answer this in two ways.
First, I'll say that if a woman doesn't ask
your name, it MIGHT mean that she's not
interested.
But the thing that concerns me about your
question is that you're really looking in the
wrong direction for clues to decide if a woman
"likes you".
IT DOESN'T MATTER IF A WOMAN "LIKES" YOU!
The only thing that matters is whether or not
she feels that powerful, magical, all-important
emotion called ATTRACTION!
I've had women who were annoyed by me, bothered
by me, and basically upset at me still feeling
ATTRACTION for me because I did the right things.
I've had women who started out fighting with me
feeling so attracted to me that they wouldn't
leave me alone for the evening until I gave them
my number.
My point is that you need to get over caring
what a woman thinks about you... and start doing
the right things.
If this doesn't make sense to you, then stay
tuned and check out my Advanced Dating Techniques
Program... really.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
Just want to tell you your material is very
good and effective. I find that women love a guy
that teases them and busts their balls. I find
that they like it when a man approaches them and
he is completely calm and cool, and even better in
control of the situation. Now I admit this,
sometimes the way I approach a girl or what I seem
to talk about doesn't "hit em" how I wanted it
too, like I seem to get boring, pretty damn
quikly...and that is when my mind just starts to
draw a blank and I dont know..it sucks. But
sometimes I say the right things and I just know
this for a fact becuz the girl will either have a
smile on her face or I'll see her licking her
lips...and from what u said in the DYD book thats
a good thing...For example: today I was sitting at
a round table with just me and a girl, we were
facing each other, and I'd say she was about an 8.
She dresses real pretty and I said something like
"Do you dress nice everyday...Or are you just
trying to impress me?" She smiled and licked her
lips so I knew that I was right on track...but
then I drew a blank... I didnt kno how to continue
that convo. What are some normal topics to bring
up in a conversation with a girl? What are some
interesting ones that they just seem to be very
into? What else would help me to keep the convo
going and so I don't draw a blank and feel like a
dork? I appreciate all the help your book has
done, reading about confidence and all that did
help..and now I would just like to touch up and
become more than just an amatuer. You do not have
to post this on the newsletter but hope to hear
from you soon.
Later,
D from CT
>>>MY COMMENTS:
This is a great question.
One of the most important things you can do is
MENTALLY PREPARE for these kinds of situations.
Now, I don't want to sound like a weird
motivational self-help guy, but mental preparation
WORKS.
Take some time when you're alone, close your
eyes, and actually plan out how you'd like
interactions with women to go. If you've never
done this before, you'll learn A LOT from it.
You'll think of things that you never would
have imagined when you're taking things step by
step in your mind.
One of the OTHER best things you can do is GET
A JOURNAL so you can keep notes to yourself.
Try this:
Sit down and write out 20 great things you
could have said in that situation, then go through
and mentally imagine saying each one five times.
Another important thing to do is ALWAYS KNOW
HOW TO GET HER INFORMATION AND WALK AWAY.
If you really sense that the conversation is
about to end, you need to know how to ask for her
email/number and go.
You can do this at any stage in the
conversation, as soon as you'd like.
Here are a few good topics to try when talking
to women:
1. Why women are crazy, and men are perfect.
2. That she should stop thinking of you only as a
sex object.
3. What she needs to change to have a chance with
you.
Of course, you need to be able to present these
topics in a COCKY & FUNNY way so she LAUGHS while
you're talking about them...
You'll find that topics like these can create
some good fun with women.
***QUESTION***
Hi David,
You are absolutely right! Being nice and wussy
doesn't work AT ALL!! Now, this technique of
getting e-mail in three minutes... I must admit
that it works very often. But it fails rather
often too. Guess my success rate is only about 50%
or something. That is, 40% gives a dummy address
and 10% does NEVER respond. Maybe i'm doing
something wrong here. But somehow i get the
impression that most women are smarter than that.
The most common response to that situation is
something like: "What? You talk to me for a few
minutes and you expect me to give my e-mail?"
My question could either be: "What am i doing
wrong?" or "Is 50% the outcome that you would
expect from this technique?". I let you decide
which question you want to answer in the interest
of your readers. Anyway, you don't hear me
complain. Because i've learned an awful lot from
your book. And my success rates have at least
doubled, if not tripled, after reading your stuff.
And 50% is far better than where i come from.
Now, for my success story, this is an approach
that gives me about 80% success. I talk to a woman
for ten minutes (not three ;-)) and then i say
something like "Hey, you seem to be rather
smart... or is that just an impression?". When she
says "no" i respond with: "Yeah right, that's what
they all say! I bet you don't dare me to double
check that!". Then i don't give her much time to
respond. I immediately come back with: "Oh... you
do? Okay... if you're up to the test, give me your
e-mail. I'll send you some tricky questions and i
expect SMART answers." I never mention "meeting"
because that always seems to trigger some
"pushing" alert. Obviously, when she refuses to
give her e-mail, i say: "See! That's exactly what
i mean! Boy! Am i disappointed!". I very often get
her e-mail after that. And those seem to be ALWAYS
correct addresses ;-) Keep up the terrific job
David! You are really HELPING! Bye, PhD (Belgium)
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I love letters like this one.
You get good email addresses from HALF the
women you talk to for three minutes?
I'd say that you're doing pretty well, cowboy.
Probably half of the women in this world are
either married, in a relationship, lesbians
(YES!), or in a bad mood.
Your technique for getting it up to 80% is
great.
Challenging, funny, and interesting. It creates
curiosity and comes across as low risk for the
women. Very nice.
Just keep working on it, and you'll improve
over time.
Good job!
***QUESTION***
Dear David,
I have to say, I am bloody disappointed with your
advice at the moment...
I've used your tips, and written you on 2
occasions concerning different subjects. Your last
mailbag actually spoke about an issue I'd had with
a woman who I KNOW is interested in me, who gave
me her number, told me she was busy and never
called back.
I love music, so, I'm always in the CD shop at the
local mall. There just happens to be a number of
attractive women who work there. To make a long
story short, one the girls starts being really
nice to me after I start ripping on her, always
waving saying hi, going out of her way to serve me
on occasions. Hell, once I heard a co worker run
out the back and say "he's here" and she came
running out to ask if I need looking after...
Never really acted interested though, didn't speak
about much other than "how was your weekend"
stuff.
So I start running into her at a club. Again she
goes out of her way to say hi. So finally she
waved from across the room one day and I signal
her to come over as I was getting a drink, she
runs over and gives me a hug and a kiss hello!! (I
don't really know this girl from a bar of soap). I
was really tired, had only slept 4 hrs the night
before, was pretty drunk, it was late too and I
was about to leave.
Basically I could have taken her home right then
and there (trust me!!) but instead I just said for
her to give me her number that I'd take her out
sometime. Didn't offer her a drink, just said I
had to go back to my friends, then we left.
I had been supposed to visit her the next day, it
was usually the day I went shopping, but I was
busy. I call her the day after, she acted fully
uninterested said she was going away for 10 days
and that she'd call after she'd packed that day.
Such as yet, no call... I don't care, she'll pay
when I see her again... in a few weeks (sometimes
it's a weeks in between visits). I'd say we r
playing a game now.
Also, just recently had a girl who I'd known thru
a friend start msging me, asking to come over to
spend time with me, she said 'chat', but she
didn't want to chat. I'd busted on her a bit
before that started happening.
The issue here with your advice is this...
How the hell do I get these girls to stop throwing
"IT" at me?? It's no fun when I just get it served
up. It's not like I get a chance to tell em that
I'm not easy, they don't say in that many words
that they want to sleep with me. You just know.
I like to play with them a bit and see if they r
gonna be worth the trouble... and I want to know a
bit about a girl before I sleep with them.
Damn dave, what's going on?? I'm just too good for
my own good it seems, how can I slow things down
and get em to play a bit longer??
Cheers!!!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You're asking the wrong guy the wrong
question... Ha Ha! I've helped you get to the
point where women are "throwing themselves at
you", and you want to know how to SLOW THEM DOWN?
Maybe go check out some "mars and venus" books
or something.
Or watch some Dr. Phil or Oprah.
I don't know... this just isn't my area of
specialty.
You're killing me over here.
***QUESTION***
Thanks a lot David, NOT!!! I've been reading your
mails for a while now and I've unconsciously been
integrating the "Cocky&Funny" into my personality
(which is great by the way), and it's so much fun
that I've realized that I do it all the time (I've
also realized that being cocky and funny with a
girl is just as if you were messing around with
your male friends' heads). But yeah so I've got a
complaint or success story, I'm not sure which it
is: so there's this girl who I've met about a year
ago and we've been best friends since then... and
then the other day she admitted to my face that
she had been in love with me for the past six
months!!!!!!!! It makes me feel great about
myself...but on the other hand it sucks cuz she
was a really great friend, almost a sister, so
I'll never be able to go out with her (and there's
nothing wrong with the looks or anything). So
yeah, I think you should put a surgeon general's
warning on your "Cocky&Funny". WARNING: May cause
you to be unexplainably attractive to (almost)
anyone! So yeah, a word of advice to all those
reading the newsletters, be careful who you use
the C&F with!
Nick, the Belgian
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Wow, another horrible side effect.
I really should stop teaching this stuff and be
a monk or something.
By the way, you can learn some more Cocky &
Funny techniques here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/CockyComedy/
***SUCCESS STORY FROM A WOMAN***
You answered my email in a recent mailbag, thank
you for answering me so quickly. Your mini- van
comment, while making me want to vomit, made me
realize I had to do something - and fast! On our
next date I said something obnoxious to him and he
gave me a funny look. Before he could say anything
I said, "you know sometimes I can get kinda
obnoxious, and when I do... just tell me to
shutup, - and from that point on he didn't let me
get away with anything! He is a "real man" after
all!! Yeah! And you said trying to teach a guy
how to stop acting like a WUSSY isn't easy ;)
Later that night when we were saying good-bye, he
said he was going to come by my work to visit, I
asked him what time he'd be there, and he just
said "you'll see" with a smirk. I smiled, said
"good answer," kissed him, and left.
Ah, the miracle of attraction! Can't wait to see
him again...thank you for saving this
relationship, and for saving me from dying of
boredom!
Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you
Thank you
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Am I really reading this stuff?
I've now got women who are teaching men this
material because they just can't deal with the
WUSS FACTOR any longer...
It's really too much.
The lesson:
A WOMAN WOULD RATHER TEACH YOU HOW TO ACT LIKE
A REAL MAN THAN DEAL WITH A WUSSY.
Unreal.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I just got your book after receiving the
newsletters for a few months and my eyes were
really opened to how many new skills I need to
acquire. In the past 6 months (before reading your
book) I went from being too nice to becoming a
prick. After reading your book, I now see that
there is much, much more to it and that it's ok to
be nice sometimes, but only on your terms. I am
having a ton of more fun now and am def. getting
reactions from women, but I realize I need to find
a middle ground. Being cocky came a little too
easy for me and right now I am focusing on adding
humor to my personality to balance it. I got
Helitzer's book but it seems a bit overwhelming.
What helped you the most when it came to adding
humor to your personality and where is a good
place to start? One thing I would recommend to all
readers is to find a good female friend to discuss
your material with. They will prove to you that
this stuff is really attention getting and will
help you improve overall.
Thanks in advance.
AW in Pa
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You've brought up a great point here.
It's SOOOO important that you find the balance
between Cocky and Funny...
If you're too cocky and arrogant you'll come
across as insecure, and if you're too funny
without adding any of the magic of being Cocky,
then you'll come across as stupid and goofy.
You must strike the balance.
You'll know when you're getting it right,
because the responses from women will become very
powerful.
Even if the reading is difficult, I still
recommend that you read the comedy book you
purchased. It's great.
As I recommended to another reader above, take
the time to write out ideas for different
situations, then rehearse them in your mind.
You'll know when you find the right balance.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I am from a Latin American country so forgive my
english if i make some mistakes. I met a girl in a
trip to the beach and i really liked her very
much. I met some of her friends and asked what was
her phone number. Several weeks after that i call
her and talk some time and i had to hang up. some
time after that i called her again and we talked
for hours and she seemeed very interested in me so
we stop talking. One time i called her to her
celular and she didnt answer and inmediatly she
called to my house that showed me that she was
interested in me. But then i called her almost
daily and she sort of got bored and when the
conversation got to about a minute she told me she
had to go. I insisted on calling her more but that
only brought bad results and i ask her if i didnt
like her i think i realy blew it with her because
i acted like a wuss.
It has passed about 3 months without talking to
her i have run with her a few times but ignore her
i dont know why. i was really pissed off but some
friends of her that are also my friends told me
that she sort of liked me. i knew she liked me
before i acted like a wuss but i think enough time
have passed and i would like to talk to her again
because during those 3 months i thought about
calling her everyday and i would want some advice
so i can know what to do. Please answer quickly i
am waiting eagerly for your answer. Please excuse
some of my expressions english is not my first
language.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, you hit the nail on the head.
When you start calling a woman too often,
acting clingy and needy, and generally behaving
like a total WUSS BAG, you're probably going to
drive her away.
Don't do it anymore!
You need to move on, and get over it.
It's a hard thing for most guys to accept, but
when you've convinced a woman beyond the shadow of
any reasonable doubt that you are a world-class
WUSSY, you just need to move on.
It's an uphill battle to try to convince her
otherwise, so just get on with your life, and
don't make the same mistake again.
Repeat after me:
"I will stop acting like a WUSS"
***QUESTION FROM A WOMAN***
I don't think I'll start my e-mail with a success
story since I'm a woman and have the freedom to
walk into any bar, walk up to any man and tell
him, "by the end of tonight you'll be in bed with
me" and it will happen.
I've been using your techniques on men for years
but never could put into words how or why it
worked. I think most of your principles are true
for both sexes. My friends often accuse me of
being a man on the inside and this is why. I am a
very confident, self sufficient 22 yr old woman,
about an 8 on a 1-10 scale. Add on top of this
the fact that I use your C+F techniques.
Most times I just meet men that I can walk all
over and lose interest in the first 30 seconds
(this is why I'm compared to men). Every now and
then I meet a man who also knows how the
attraction thing works and we hit it off and have
a great "mental tennis" match. This is the
problem. The men I do meet that can match me and
keep my interest are great for a little while, but
then once they realize I can keep up with them and
please them in bed like most women won't, they get
over excited and turn into wussies. They start
telling me how they've looked their whole life for
a woman like me and yadda yadda. That's great and
I appreciate the compliments, but they aren't
keeping up the C+F/self confidence and I lose
interest--FAST. Case in point: I met a guy who
was about a 6 on a 1-10 scale. He had the whole
C+F thing going on. Everything was great for a few
dates until he confessed to me that he felt like
he was "playing out of his sandbox" and that he
didn't understand why someone as beautiful as I
would continue to see him. In the snap of a
finger I lost all interest in him because at that
point, I was above him instead of on equal playing
ground.
So this is my question: Is there a secret
underground society of double your dating fanatics
that actually know how to keep a woman's interest?
and if so where do I find these men? Also, since
I'm sure there isn't one, can you give me any
ideas as to how to keep men at a safe enough
distance that they don't feel like confiding all
their insecurities in me?
Thanks, David, you truly are an attraction genius!
Keep up the great work!
K.H. in Ogden, UT
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yes, there is a secret underground society of
Double Your Dating fanatics who actually know how
to keep a woman's interest.
But the bad news is that THEY'RE NOT IN OGDEN,
UTAH!
Was that your first guess about where they'd be
located?
Are you sure that you're as sharp as you say
you are?
I don't know if I personally buy it.
I've used your email to point out something
VERY IMPORTANT TO MY READERS...
MOST GUYS, EVEN WHEN THEY "GET IT", EVENTUALLY
TURN INTO TOTAL WUSS-BAGS AND STOP DOING THE
THINGS THAT ORIGINALLY MADE A WOMAN FEEL
ATTRACTION FOR THEM.
This is when the woman usually hits the road,
and the man is left thinking "What did I do
wrong... I was such a NICE GUY."
This is a bad thing, so don't do it.
***QUESTION***
Dave the Expert, i never in a million years
thought a book like yours would ever come out and
help millions of guys out here that constantly
struggle to find the exact way to attract a woman!
And your book is IT...!! i have had a lot of
success these past eight months ever since i
bought your book and from reading your
newsletters. i've never dated so many women, it's
grrrrrreat! but the time has come for me to ask
you a question that i am practically begging you
to respond to. i finally met this terrific girl
who i think is the "one" 4 months ago and we've
been dating since but we just recently broke up
because she moved to college about 4 hours away
from me. it hurt me so bad. i used the cocky/funny
approach to reel her in at the beginning and kept
up the cocky/funny attitude the whole way through
until...the break up. ouch! you see, we are both
dancers and we both dance in the same dance studio
but she only comes down from college to practice
maybe once every couple of weeks because her and i
are in a duet together. we have a competition in
about a month so i couldn't just back out of it
but it is really awkward having to dance with her
because i still have feelings for her and our duet
is avery emotional dance w/ a lot of feeling
involved. we broke up because she said that
college was stressing her out so much and she felt
that our relationship wouldn't work because long
distance relationships are hard and we couldn't
see each other as much as we wanted to. plus, she
is on scholarship and she can't let herself make
bad grades or else she can't maintain her
scholarship. she didn't mean this in a bad way but
told me that i was a little cause of her stress
because we would talk on the phone when she was
supposed to be doing homework. w/ all the homework
and the dance team practices up there she stays
busy and rarely ever gets to come down except to
practice our duet. we've agreed to just be friends
but dave, it just doesn't feel right. i want to be
more than friends but i just don't see a way for
this relationship to work out and have it be the
way it was when we first started dating! i miss
her so much and would do anythingto get her back
and i think i screwed up by telling her that! i
told her that i would make time for her and that i
never felt this way about a girl before, which is
true. god, i know i was a complete wussy after we
broke up but i felt that it was the right thing to
do because after 4 months it didn't seem to matter
if i spilled my feelings to her, right? dave, i
need to know what to do to get her back because i
still have to dance w/ her and i don't want to
feel uncomfortable and insecure when i'm around
her. any advice would greatly be appreciated!
-R.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I'm glad you've had so much success with the
materials, and I appreciate the feedback.
I don't usually respond to "relationship"
questions... but I just can't help this one.
You've switched into WUSS BOY mode, and you're
only shooting yourself in the foot, man.
Get on with your life, stop acting like a
wussy, and quit telling her that you'd "do
anything to get her back".
I know it's what you FEEL like saying, but it
will only make you look weaker and weaker if you
keep it up and don't just put it behind you and
move on.
If you want to have any chance at all of this
relationship work out, then you're going to have
to quit acting whipped and needy.
Now use what you've learned to go meet some new
women and stop acting like a Wuss.
***QUESTION***
Dear Dave,
I've been reading your articles for the past 2
weeks, i think it is so awesome, and i'm soon
going to buy your book. i wanted to tell you that
i have no problems with women when i'm not
attracted to them, but if they are a perfect 10 i
get scared, and i can't even say hi to them, help
me, how can i overcome this fear of pretty girls?
When the girl is not so hot i don't have any
problems talking to them, getting their phone
number and going on a date with them, the problem
is how do i attract the beautiful women and how
should i approach and actually start a
conversation with them?
thanks G. i appreciate your help.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, first of all, go check out an issue of
the magazine that goes by the name of Perfect 10.
You'll see that the women in there are all over
the map.
In other words, every guy has a different idea
of what a "10" is.
Yes, some women are obviously more attractive
or "fixed up" than others, but we all have
different tastes, and in the morning when she
wakes up she's going to look a WHOLE LOT different
than she does when you first see her.
So remember that this girl who is a "10" to you
is only a 6 or 7 to another guy. That should help.
Next, if you can't figure out how to get over
your fear of approaching attractive women, then
you're going to have to just face your fear and do
it anyway.
To start with, just focus on saying ANYTHING to
the women you see. You need to see for yourself
and teach your mind and body not to be afraid of
women.
I don't care if you walk up to the next 100
women you see and say "You're beautiful... can I
have your autograph?"
lol... that's pretty funny... I just might try
that one myself, come to think of it.
My point is that you need to JUST DO SOMETHING!
Most of the anxiety involved in approaching
attractive women comes from the FEAR OF THE
UNKNOWN and the FEAR OF EMBARRASSMENT OR
REJECTION.
Once you actually approach a bunch of women and
talk to them, you'll find that nothing bad is
going to happen to you. This works wonders.
Then, when you've gotten past your fear, you
can lead the conversations to getting numbers,
etc.
And SPEAKING of overcoming fear, starting
conversations with women, getting numbers, getting
dates, and learning how to take things to a
PHYSICAL level with women smoothly and without
rejection...
...I've spent a loooong time studying this
topic.
In fact, I've put more time, effort, and study
into this area than just about anyone I have ever
met (and I've met some guys who are pretty darn
good with women).
A few years ago I decided to do something kind
of crazy with all this amazing stuff I learned
about women and dating... I wrote it all down. In
fact, I not only wrote it all down, but I
organized it into logical sections, then created a
BOOK.
That book is called "Double Your Dating".
And then I did something ELSE that's kind of
crazy.
Instead of printing copies of the book, I
decided to only make it available on the
INTERNET... as a downloadable "eBook".
Gotta love technology.
And get this... if you'd like to get a copy of
this book, you can download it right now and
literally be reading it within a few minutes...
from your computer screen.
Go here to download it:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/eBook/
And if you've already read my eBook and you're
ready to REALLY get this entire area of your life
handled, then I'd like to suggest EXTREME
MEASURES...
My Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD program.
This program contains over 12 hours of
digitally recorded and edited video and/or audio
of me personally teaching ADVANCED techniques for
overcoming fear, approaching women, getting email
addresses and numbers... and I'm talking about
HUNDREDS of ideas.
When you go through this program, you'll also
meet some of my personal friends and guest
speakers who will teach you incredible secrets for
meeting women online, giving women fantastic date
experiences for little or no money... and
communicating in a way that makes women feel an
incredible "animal" attraction for you.
All live and all THE VERY BEST STUFF.
If you'd like to get a copy without risk to you,
go here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/AdvancedSeries/
And I'll talk to you soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. Make sure you take a minute to check out
the other programs I've created. You can see
them all right here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
--------------------------------------------------
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