Why Women Aren't Attracted To "Nice" Guys
>NOTE: If you'd like to learn how to go beyond
"tricks" and "lines" for meeting women, and learn
how to create a powerful "inner confidence" that
women find instantly attractive, then take a
minute and read this:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/OnBeingAMan
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
ATTENTION "NICE GUYS":
If you are a "nice guy" who never seems to be
able to attract HOT women, or you have attractive
female friends who always seem to say, "He's
really wonderful, but I just like him as a
FRIEND", then this could possibly be the single
most important thing you ever read in your entire
life.
And I'm not kidding... not even a little.
If I had to sum up the biggest mistake that I
see men making with women (and the big mistake
that I've made myself too many times to count),
it's being a WUSSY.
Being a WUSS comes in two main flavors:
1) Acting like a WUSSY to begin with.
2) Turning INTO a WUSSY as you get to know her.
I would venture to guess that most men either
act like WUSSIES with women they're attracted to
ALL the time, or they turn into WUSSIES within a
few weeks or months of meeting a woman that they
REALLY like.
I know, this sounds a little strange, right?
What the heck should being a Wuss have to do
with attracting women?
The answer: EVERYTHING.
Let's review a few of the most important
concepts to remember when it comes to attracting
women:
1) ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE. As humans, we don't
"consciously choose" who we FEEL attracted to. It
just "happens" to us... BANG! And you can't
"convince" someone to FEEL this powerful emotion.
2) ATTRACTION DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. When you think
about the concept of being emotionally attracted
to another person, it only "makes sense" that you
should feel attracted to good qualities like
"niceness" and "honesty" and "loyalty", right?
Well guess what... ATTRACTION doesn't play by
those rules. The things that we are ATTRACTED to
don't make "logical sense" when you look at them.
We all know that attractive women seem to date a
lot of abusive jerks... and that men often stay in
relationships with unhappy, domineering women. For
ATTRACTION to make "logical sense", you must learn
how it works, and get a deeper understanding of
what triggers it.
3) STATUS is very important when it comes to
ATTRACTION. Women are almost NEVER attracted to
men of "lower status" than themselves. This is why
certain stereotypes exist, such as women not
liking shorter men, and women who make a lot of
money being intimidating to men.
4) ATTRACTIVE WOMEN HAVE A LOT OF CHOICES. Most
men have never even taken a minute of their lives
to consider what it must be like to be an
attractive woman. Attractive women are approached
in one way or another ALL THE TIME by men who are
interested in them. For an attractive woman, every
smile, every kind gesture, and every favor is in
one way or another viewed as INTEREST. An
attractive woman is approached in one way or
another MANY times a day. It would be impossible
for an attractive woman to give even a small
fraction of her time to each of the men who shows
interest in her.
5) MEN ARE SOOOOO UNORIGINAL. Just as most men
have never given a thought to how it must feel and
what it must be like to be an attractive woman,
most men have never given a thought to the fact
that MEN ARE PREDICTABLE BEYOND BELIEF... from an
attractive woman's point of view. The comment or
compliment that you think is so original, or the
invitation to a date... or the question about her
having a boyfriend... or the comment that "her
boyfriend is a lucky man"... is so UNORIGINAL,
PREDICTABLE... AND WORST OF ALL, BORING to an
attractive woman. She gets this stuff 100 times a
day! And men who are unoriginal do NOT stand out
from the crowd.
6) ATTRACTIVE WOMEN HAVE WUSS-DAR! There are a few
simple, unmistakable signals that men give off
that say, "Hey, I'm just another WUSS, so don't
pay attention to anything else I do, because I'll
always be one"... which, of course, makes women
RUN. (As a side note, attractive women also have
NON-WUSS-DAR as well. In other words, from a few
simple clues, an attractive woman can quickly know
if she is dealing with a man who is NOT a Wuss,
and who, therefore, will be one of the few who are
allowed the time and consideration for romantic
interactions.)
Soooo, what is it about being a WUSS that is
the big problem here?
Why is it that of all things in the world, this
is the "big sin" when it comes to attracting
women?
It's taken me several years now to really
figure this out, and it's not exactly simple to
explain (A detailed explanation is available in my
Advanced Dating Techniques Program).
But, I'll sum it up and say this:
WOMEN COME "PRE-PROGRAMMED"
WITH A MENTAL IMAGE OF THE KIND
OF MAN THAT THEY SHOULD FEEL
ATTRACTION FOR. THIS PROGRAMMING
IS BOTH GENETIC AND CULTURAL. WHEN
A WOMAN MEETS THIS MAN, THINGS
HAPPEN ON THEIR OWN... INSTANTLY.
Now, I personally believe that MOST of this
programming is genetic. In other words, women are
BORN with it.
Attraction isn't like other things that "seem"
like they should be similar.
If you want to make friends with someone, you
should be nice, do them favors, be courteous, and
generally act like you're making an effort.
But, when you try to take this kind of thinking
and apply it to ATTRACTION (which almost all men
do), then you find yourself doing things that
SHOULD work... but they don't.
ATTRACTION is very "counter intuitive" (damn, I
love it when I use big words)... which means that
it's not the way it "should" be. It's different
than it seems at first glance. It's deceptive in a
way because unless you "get" how it works, you'll
just keep beating your head up against the wall
doing things that don't work, "trying harder" when
these things fail, and actually making things
WORSE as a result of not understanding it.
Have you ever met a woman and given her a
compliment, only to have her walk away and show no
interest?
Or pursued a woman with gifts, favors, and
dinners, only to have her be "confused" and need
"time alone"... which eventually led to her
wanting to "just be friends"?
Have you ever had an attractive female friend
who liked to date abusive jerks... and then tell
YOU about the abuse she was putting up with... all
the while you would have done ANYTHING for a
chance to be with her?
Yeah, me too.
That's what I mean it when I say that you can
actually make things WORSE by TRYING HARDER when
you don't "get" how attraction works.
>>>Quick note: If you want to learn the "secret
language" of attraction... and how to trigger this
response in women with your communication ALONE,
then read this before you continue:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/SexualCommunication
If I had to sum it all up, and describe the one
HUGE mistake that men make with women... the one
that causes the most pain and prevents the most
success, I'd have to say that it was...
BEING A WUSSY, OR TURNING INTO ONE.
For a lot of reasons, a WUSSY just doesn't make
for an interesting, romantic counterpart. Women
will SETTLE for a Wuss, or even SETTLE DOWN with
one (usually after the Wuss has demonstrated his
TOTAL lack of self-respect, and his COMPLETE
willingness to put aside all of his own needs for
a woman). Unfortunately, this often ends with the
woman cheating on the Wuss, leaving him for
someone else, taking everything from him
(including his self esteem) etc...
I digress...
The point is, a WUSSY doesn't trigger
ATTRACTION.
Wussies are BORING. They're needy. They lack
ENERGY, act CLINGY, and make women feel TRAPPED
and repulsed.
Everything about the WUSS spells "DON'T PICK
ME".
Now, the first thing most guys say when they
hear this news is, "But I don't want to be a JERK
to women" or "I like the idea of being NICE" or
"I'm just being MYSELF with women... what's wrong
with that?".
I can identify.
I get it.
I spent many years of my life thinking these
kinds of things.
Well, the good news is that you don't need to
be a "jerk" or treat women badly to attract them.
lol...
You just need to:
1) Abandon your Wussy Ways.
2) Learn how ATTRACTION works.
3) Change how you look at relationships.
4) Learn the specific things that you need to do
in each situation to meet women and make them feel
that wonderful, powerful, magical, elusive emotion
called ATTRACTION.
5) Never "slip", or allow yourself to start
behaving like a WUSSY as you get to know a woman.
Doesn't sound too hard, right?
Good...
I'd like to get you started with some homework.
You have an assignment for the week.
Here it is:
1) Stop being "nice" to attractive women. This
means no asking women out, no giving them lots of
compliments, no putting your needs aside, no
accepting manipulative behavior to please women,
and no giving women special treatment or
privileges just because they're attractive. NOTE:
I did NOT say to treat women BADLY. I'm just
telling you to stop doing all the FAKE things
you're doing just to make women like you.
2) Stop handing women your, um, testosterone
making devices on a silver platter. In other
words, stop giving away your power to women. Do
not communicate in ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM that
you will put aside your own self respect in order
to get a woman's approval.
3) Say the word "NO" to a request from an
attractive woman at least once every single day.
Do NOT do this in an angry, mean, or abusive way.
Just simply say, "no". (By the way, it's OK to say
"no" in a serious tone, then DO the thing she
requested after making her sweat a little. This is
using sarcasm and humor, and if it's done right it
will earn you big points).
4) Pay close attention as you do these things, and
notice how attractive women will seem MORE
comfortable being around you, and want to spend
MORE time with you... all because you're not
acting needy, clingy, and WUSS-LIKE.
5) If you own a copy of my Advanced Dating
Techniques program, I'd like you to watch or
listen to the five live interviews on that program
again. This time, I want you to only pay attention
to one thing: Do ANY of these guys, including
myself, say anything that would lead you to
believe that we act like WUSSIES around women?
...and if you don't own a copy of my Advanced
Dating Techniques CD/DVD program yet, then you
really need to get it. It has the most complete
and detailed explanation of how to stop being a
WUSSY available. Of course, it also contains
several HUNDRED of the best ideas and specific
step-by-step techniques for approaching, meeting,
dating, kissing, and getting physical with
women...
The interviews that I mentioned above are worth
the price of the entire program alone. You'll
actually get to watch or listen to me interview my
friends who are AMAZING with women... and get them
to describe their personal secrets. Priceless!
All the details, plus free audio and video
samples are all here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/AdvancedSeries
...and if you haven't had a chance to download
your copy of my online eBook "Double Your Dating",
then you need to do that IMMEDIATELY. You can
download it and be reading it in just a few
minutes from right now.
It's here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/eBook
And I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
David D.
P.S. Have you seen all the different programs
I've created to help you meet more women?
You can see all of them right here, plus watch
great free VIDEO clips:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
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