People ask me to tell them the "ONE THING" that can make their intimate life better. It's such an unfair question because everyone is in a different place, and relationships mature and become better over time if you focus on them. But if pressed, I'd say Passion Playdates could be the #1 way to have better passion and intimacy. Passion Playdates (we often call them Sandbox Dates or Erotic Playdates) are when you and your partner set aside a specific time for passion play and sensual "private" activities. You enter as beginners, assuming you know nothing and proceeding to learn new things together. These are little activities that expand your pleasure together as a couple. Think of it as a fun "couples exercise" that enriches your intimacy – physical and emotional. Singles can even learn these Passion Playdates to be ready for their future partner. Now, for our Passion Playdate #1, let's do "Sharing Frames." SHARING FRAMES PLAYDATE When I say frame, I mean a border around a picture – a snapshot in time, a short sequence, or a single moment. For this Playdate, you and your partner will share a special moment of a recent experience. What's great is you can have this playdate while driving or at dinner together. It doesn't have to be IN the bedroom, and the sensual talk can increase your desire for one another. In as much physical and sensation-based detail as possible, you will share a moment of lovemaking where you experienced something sublime, sensual, erotic, or extra special. "For example, the other day, I came back from a swim, and my body felt dry. My husband laid me down on the bed, and he massaged organic coconut oil into my whole body. He started with my arms and legs. Then he gave me a breast and belly massage, and then he did my back and my rear end. Then he finished with a foot massage. And then I took a two-and-a-half-hour afternoon nap. His hands, shimmering with oil, felt nurturing and sensual, rubbing my entire body. I went from dry to lubricated. It felt so luxurious. And I loved that he did it to make me feel wonderful, without expecting anything in return." There, I just shared a frame with you. People genuinely enjoy re-living specific date experiences, and they also find they can enjoy new details they missed the first time around. You may have had a different perspective than your partner, and they may be surprised at your point of view. There are even times when YOU share the frame of your favorite experiences. You'll remember new details from your subconscious mind. FUN! These frames can be about events both inside and outside the sensual privacy of your bedroom. Topics can range from tame to erotic. You decide. Have lots of fun with this! For example, you may say to your partner, "There was a time when I kissed your neck back when we were still dating, and it may be because you're very ticklish, but you twisted your body, curled your head down, and your arms came up to touch and hold my face. And that felt very sensual and warm to me at the time." You may sometimes even share non-passion-related frames, such as your partner waking up early to cook your favorite meal on your birthday or when they volunteered to take on the housework while you get your work done. These will all be very personal frames for both of you, and I know you'll have a lot of fun sharing them with the mindset of complete beginners. This will grow your appreciation, respect, and love for each other and make your relationship bloom. We wrote this week's articles to give you more experiences and frames to share with your partner. Expand Your Life, Suz Susan Bratton, "Intimacy Expert to Millions", is a champion and advocate for all those who desire lifelong intimacy and passion. She is the best-selling author and publisher of 34 books and programs on lovemaking techniques and bedroom communication skills such as Sexual Soulmates, Relationship Magic, Revive Her Drive, The Steamy Sex Ed® Video Collection, Hormone Balancing, The Pump Guide and Thrust In Time. You can find The Susan Bratton Show™ at BetterLover.com, her more personal posts @susanbratton on Instagram, and her new sexual vitality supplements DESIRE with Tribulus, Tongkat Ali and Fenugreek and her wildly successful blood flow booster, FLOW at The20store.com. |
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