My 66-year old friend Greg recently attended a weekend sexuality workshop. He had earlier attended the workshop with his girlfriend. But she has since broken up with him.
He was nervous about going by himself. What if nobody wanted to partner with him? What if he was the "odd man out?"
This put him on edge.
To his delightful relief, the workshop leaders assigned him the role of, "Freedancer," which meant anyone who needed a partner for an exercise could invite him to support them.
Because like most good people, he's a giver. He loved this role of being available and in service to anyone who needed him during the weekend.
When our daughter was a little girl, Tim and I would drop her off at "ski bunny school." She was scared to go. She didn't know anyone. She didn't know what to do. And what worked so well was to explain to her that all the other kids were just as scared, maybe even MORE scared than she was.
And instead of worrying, she should find other kids who looked more scared and befriend them and help them out.
There's always someone more scared than you. And turning your fear of rejection or embarrassment into support for someone else works like magic.
Instead of being worried, now you're helping out.
Instead of feeling like it's too edgy to be in the situation, you become a confident Edgewalker. You CAN do it.
Greg, as the Freedancer, was more confident and more valuable than Greg, the solo guy.
Taylor, as the Mama Ski Bunny instead of the scared little rabbit, was more confident and offered more value.
When you give, you get.
The next time you're feeling left out, disconnected, lonely, or afraid, turn the tables and become Freedancer, Edgewalker or Mama Bunny and help someone else out.
You'll feel great about yourself.
Dance And Live Freely,
Susan
P.S. Sit down, get comfy, and put your feet up. I wrote these emails to help you dip your toes into dancing through life freely and with more sensuality and passion.
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