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>>>COMMENT FROM A READER:
Hi Obi'Wan De'Angelo,
I was one of, I'm guessing, the heaps of other
guys that have trouble with the ladies that are
giant procrastinators.
This was a major problem of mine, I'd think about
what to do and what to say, only to find that I
missed my opportunity in doing so.
Then a few weeks after reading "Double Your
Dating" I thought bugger this what am I scared of
a little girl who is smaller than me not being
interested. What a way to live life. Worried so
much about what somebody else might think or say.
I'm 19 and had never dated, so I set myself a goal
of getting half a dozen dates by the end of the
year. Now this may not seem like a lot, but to me
it seemed almost impossible.
I started by phoning a girl that is in my course
at uni who's number I already had, and I arranged
a study date. When I say 'I' she basically
organized it, I think she was just waiting for me
to show some initiative because she sounded almost
ecstatic that I had phoned'.
And although I didn't jump straight in the deep-
end asking a stranger for her number, that was
only a step away. Now I have so many girls to
choose from it's almost confusing. Though I prefer
being confused than lonely.
So Dave what I'm trying to say is you have
improved my life tenfold. Not only am I having a
great time seeing different girls, I'm also doing
better at my studies because I no longer have in
the back of my mind how pathetic I am. I also have
made more friends through knowing so many more
people. All I needed was that first little step
and it soon snowballed, because as you know pretty
girls know pretty girls, now it's just a matter of
finding one that meets my now prestigious
standards.
Dave IOU my life, thanks.
T.G.
Australia
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Thanks for the great Success Story! Nice!
Ah, the concept that is near and dear to all of us men who have started on the path to success with women and dating...
FEAR.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of embarrassment.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of what a woman might do if we start talking to her.
Fear of what other guys would think if they knew that we needed help with women.
Fear of what WOMEN would think if they knew that we needed help with women.
Fear of admitting that we're AFRAID.
...and about 100 others.
But, what exactly IS fear?
And why is it such a problem?
And what can be done to overcome it?
(By the way, as I mentioned at the beginning, if you want to REALLY get past your internal fears, then you need to do DEEP work.) I recommend that you STRONGLY consider the information that I share HERE as well.
Onward...
Well, let's start with what fear is, then we'll move on to some techniques to get past it.
I once heard a great definition of FEAR:
False Evidence Appearing Real
In other words, the things that you feel fear about are usually not real. It's usually just "false evidence".
You also might think back about the last 10 things you felt fear around. Now, ask yourself... Did any of those things come true?
In most of the cases, you'll find that the fear did NOT come true.
I heard once that something like 98% of the things that people fear and worry about never come true.
I've found this to be true in my own life as well.
Fear is an emotion, or an emotional state. It's an amazing and wonderful emotion... because it can help save your life in certain situations.
A hundred thousand years ago, when we were running around in the desert, we needed powerful, motivating emotions like FEAR to save our lives.
When you feel fear (especially if it's a response to real physical danger) you'll notice that some AMAZING things happen. Your eyes open up wider so you can see better, adrenaline pumps into your body, your heart beats fast to deliver blood to your muscles, and all kinds of other wondrous processes are triggered.
The PROBLEM is when we experience fear at times when there IS NO real physical danger.
We humans are amazing. We can just IMAGINE things and feel fear in response to the mental images.
And I'm sure you know exactly what the problem is with this... it can IMMOBILIZE you at critical times.
Have you ever seen a woman that you'd like to meet, but you just couldn't walk over and start talking to her?
No, it's never happened to me, either.
What was the problem?
Usually, it's fear.
Fear that she'll get upset, or fear that she'll have a boyfriend... or fear that she'll embarrass you in front of others... or fear that you won't know what to say to her...
And, of course, when you feel that strong fear emotion, it just FREEZES you and makes you totally ineffective.
So, what's the solution?
Well, there are several ways to overcome fears.
One way is to do the thing you fear. If you do the thing that you fear, and see that nothing bad will happen, then you eventually overcome it and become programmed not to feel fear anymore.
For instance, if you're afraid to approach women and talk to them, just DO IT. Go talk to 50 women in the next week and see that most of them will respond positively to you (if you don't act like a dumb-ass, that is).
Other ways to overcome your fear when it comes to approaching women include:
- Understanding the dynamics of male/female interactions better than most women do.
- Learning how to approach women using the same types of words and body language that the masters use.
- Learning how to use props or other devices to get a woman's attention without having to "approach" her directly.
- Learning mental techniques to overcome fears or "reset" your emotions instantly, anytime you'd like (this is one of my personal favorites).
- Using mental preparation to be completely ready for anything that might happen.
...and there are several others.
I have spent a lot of time in my own personal life learning about and figuring out how to get past fears and other psychological obstacles with women.
In fact, I devote almost HALF of my Advanced Series Program to the idea of the "Inner Game"... and focusing on how to get your mind and emotions in the right place so that when you use your techniques they work MUCH BETTER when you do use them.
I teach several concepts and guided exercises specifically for overcoming fear, programming yourself for success, and programming your mind to succeed with women.
It's taken me many years to find the different types of exercises and technologies that you can learn in a few hours of listening and practice.
I recommend that you go check it out...right now.
And if you haven't downloaded my online eBook "Double Your Dating", then you need to do that now. You can download it right now and be reading it within a few minutes.
You can get past your fears, but you need to learn how...
So make the commitment to yourself, and do it!
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