Secrets About Women Mom Never Taught You
>If you'd like to see all of my different
programs... each one designed to help you learn
how to meet and attract women better... and even
see video clips from each of them... then take a
minute and go check THIS out:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
Dave, Why is it that a woman who is only
interested in the funny, cocky and challenging
(i.e., interesting) men, later in life tries to
raise sons that are sweet, thoughtful and "nice"?
(i.e., run of the mill)!! WS New York
>>>MY COMMENTS:
This is a VERY interesting question, and I'm
glad you emailed me to ask it.
I'm going to give you my personal take on this.
But, more importantly, I'm going to talk about how
these kinds of paradoxes exist right in plain
sight all around us... and how to interpret them
so you can increase your own personal success with
women and dating.
So, to answer your question first...
I've spent a lot of time researching this
topic, and doing a lot of personal testing to see
if I could find some answers.
Right now, as I write this, I think that it
goes like this:
"Being Nice" in the way that you're describing,
usually means things like: giving compliments,
buying gifts, providing food, doing favors,
tolerating emotional manipulation, pretending to
be in a good mood even if you're not, etc.
I believe that this is mostly a SOCIALLY and
CULTURALLY CONSTRUCTED set of "rules". There may
be some "hard wiring" in us that makes us
"naturally" want to do nice things for women so
they'll give us approval, but I think it's mostly
PROGRAMMED into us...
Now, think about it this way: These "nice"
things are typically very FEMININE things to do...
So, what's a mom in today's culture going to
teach her son?
Of course... how to be "nice" to girls.
And, what if there's no dad around to help out
in the "training" of a son? You guessed it... even
MORE "nice" programming from mom.
The bottom line is that most of the people
walking around on this planet have NO IDEA how
ATTRACTION works, and therefore will never be able
to TEACH another person how this fabulous process
works.
This includes mothers. Mom loved you and wanted
the best for you, she just had no idea how to
explain what makes women feel ATTRACTION. Mom may
have gotten the tingles when she saw Clint
Eastwood shooting everyone... and Neil Diamond
running around with his sneer, hairy chest and
that pickle in his jeans... (and that reminds
me... EWWWWWW... your mom is gross, dude).
But, this doesn't mean that she can or would
explain to her boy how to make this happen with
other women!
Check this out: If you would like to learn my
own PERSONAL secrets for how to overcome this
problem of not knowing how to become a man who
NATURALLY attracts women, then you should go here
NOW:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/OnBeingAMan/
OK. Let's talk about what we can actually LEARN
from this kind of phenomenon.
The thing that really fascinates me about
people is THEIR ABILITY TO HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S
GOING ON... even though it's going on IN PLAIN
SIGHT ALL AROUND THEM... and the even MORE amazing
tendency to ARGUE VIOLENTLY WHEN one of these
OBVIOUS THINGS IS PRESENTED TO THEM.
I've read some fascinating books about the
concept of "self-deception", and I've come to
realize that we humans have an amazing capacity
for not seeing what's there... to the point where
it can be very bad for us.
Like I just said, we often ARGUE about things
that are OBVIOUS to others... which makes it even
worse.
I need to stop ranting and raving, and land the
plane on this one...
This mechanism is, of course, a survival
mechanism that helps us to weed out all of the
useless information that's coming in through our
senses at any given time, but it can go overboard
and prevent us from seeing USEFUL information as
well.
Next Point: A lot of our cultural and social
programming is "off-base" to some degree, which
causes us to see things and interpret things
incorrectly when we do see them.
Finally, we humans don't like to change our
beliefs about things. We don't like to admit that
we might be wrong in the first place, and we feel
unstable or insecure when we realize that a
fundamental truth we have held all our life is
incorrect.
Lump all of this together, and you have moms
who teach their sons the "proper" way to act and
men who have NO IDEA how to be successful with
women... and then women who REALLY get upset when
you actually start teaching men what WORKS to
attract women (for more evidence of this, just
read some of these newsletters I'm sending you!)
Wow, I'm really going on an unusually
intellectual rant today! Nice. This is making me
feel pretty smart... I think I'll keep it up...
So, what's all this information good for?
Well, to start off, I think that it's important
in life to continually question YOUR OWN beliefs
about how things work and what is possible.
I think it's also good to constantly question
your LIMITING beliefs.
Unfortunately, most people do the opposite...
they question their ability to succeed and they
doubt their own ability to get what they want.
Most people constantly "self-sabotage"
themselves.
If instead, you question your LIMITATIONS and
your LIMITING BELIEFS, and you constantly look
with your own eyes to see if there's something
going on that nobody mentioned to you, then you'll
begin to see things that will blow your mind.
It took me about 4 or 5 years to realize that
ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE. But as soon as I say
it, you can immediately get what I'm talking
about, and maybe even have a profound realization
that will lead to success.
The phrase "Attraction Isn't A Choice" makes
you have the "ah ha" that you can't make a woman
feel attraction for you by CONVINCING her... so
you STOP.
Now, I didn't figure this out by having someone
TELL it to me. I figured it out by questioning the
things I was hearing, and by following my own
intuition that there was a SOLUTION to this puzzle
called "women and dating".
So, here's a "home work" assignment for you:
1 - Write down all of the things that SHOULD work
when it comes to making women feel attracted to
you. This might include buying gifts and food,
giving constant compliments, and acting "nice".
2 - Write down your own personal experience of
what ACTUALLY HAPPENS when you do these "socially
correct things that mom taught you" with women.
3 - Pretend for a moment that everything you've
been taught about women is wrong. Furthermore,
pretend that women are actually wired in REVERSE.
If this were true, what kinds of things would
result in a woman feeling ATTRACTION for a man?
Does this open up some new possibilities for
you?
I invite you to question "common sense" and
"what your mother taught you" about women.
I also invite you to come and learn some of the
VERY ILLOGICAL, YET INCREDIBLY POWERFUL techniques
that I've learned, developed, refined, and
described in my Advanced Dating Techniques CD/DVD
program.
The ideas that I've just discussed are part of
what I consider to be the "Inner Game" of dating
success.
Most guys spend almost NO time working on their
Inner Game... instead, they spend time learning
things like "pick up lines" and other almost
USELESS stuff.
If you don't have your "Inner Game" together,
you'll never be effective with "techniques and
tricks".
In my Advanced Dating Techniques program, I
spend several HOURS teaching you one Inner Game
technique after another... showing you how to
overcome fear, improve your self image and self
esteem... and get past limiting beliefs that stop
you from even TRYING to meet women.
If you're like me, and you've had a lot of
negative programming earlier in life, then you
MUST get that stuff handled. It's not going to
handle itself... YOU have to do it.
And this program will show you EXACTLY how.
Oh... and it will also teach you TONS of great
"in the field" techniques for approaching women,
starting conversations, getting dates, meeting
women online, and taking things to a "physical"
level smoothly and easily... without rejection.
Not too long ago I put up a bunch of new sample
video clips... and you should go watch them right
now. They're here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/AdvancedSeries/
And if you haven't downloaded your copy of my
online eBook, "Double Your Dating", then you need
to go and do that RIGHT NOW. You can download it
and be reading it in just a few minutes from now.
Just go here:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/eBook/
I'll talk to you again soon.
David D.
P.S. Hey, don't forget to take some time to look
through all of my different DVD/CD programs. You
can see them all, plus watch video clips of all of
them in this one handy place:
http://www.DoubleYourDates.com/Catalog/
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